We could laugh, we could dance, but I didn’t grow up in a house that was safe for love. I felt it. I expressed it quietly to my sister. But that wasn’t part of our family culture.
My mother recently reflected that she wonders why she wasn’t more affectionate with us. She recalled random acts of violence in the home she grew up in. She wonders if that made her more standoffish.
Holding my son before school this morning, I thought, ‘Yes, this is important’. Our kids know that if they ever feel love, it is safe to express it. They know that love is always here for them.
Love needs consistency. Love needs to know that whether there was just shouting or a disagreement, no matter what, it is safe to come out. Like a songbird, it has to know that it won’t be swatted out of the sky if it takes flight. It will always be welcomed. It will always be appreciated. It will always be safe. Love is never more than an arm’s reach away.
I’m tough. I won’t do for my kids what I know they can do for themselves. I want them to be strong, capable, and kind. I am unyielding in my discipline. But love is always there for them - in an environment that allows it to take safe flight.
It is the same for psychedelic journeys. Within the protective atmosphere of love, the flower of consciousness blooms.
Photo by Eliya Selhub